If you follow my blog and videos, you will know I have been searching for a partner… a girlfriend. I will share a bit of private info.
During my illness of nearly 3 years, and bed-ridden for 2 1/2 of those years. During that time, I was alone. That was my choice. Up until then, I had a girlfriend of one year, but in truth, it wasn’t all that serious. I was immersed in my work and had little room for anyone else. It was more a situati0on of convenience for both of us. I will say she was very nice and in time it could have been something special. However, when I learned I was sick and that the outcome would take time and possibly not very good, I felt I should do it alone. Now, of course, my ego would love to tell you that it was selfless, that I didn’t want to put her through it all, but I must be more honest than that here so I will say I didn’t want the burden of someone else while I would go through something so personal. I fact, I didn’t tell anyone. Not even family. So through that time, certainly no relationship.
When I had my “miracle cure”, I left for Ecuador. Before I left I was given a prescription for a medication and was told I must take it at least three years and possibly the rest of my life. Let me tell you a bit about the meds.
There were two pills, that worked together. One is like a catalyst for the other. There was no alternative to these. They came with certain side effects. First, they dropped my metabolism to zero. Since I had already gotten so fat (as in big as a house) during that time stuck in bed, this wasn’t good news. It also killed any chance of libido. In fact, it has a risk of impotence long term. I can confirm the symptom, as I had no thoughts or desire to have anyone in that sort of way for over two years in Ecuador. It was humorous to me some comments I would get about videos because I had so many young girl friendships. I will respond to that now.
My entire life most of my friends were female. Early on it was for the obvious reason. But in time, I found they often made better friends. I am very selective about friends and usually do not have or want very many. Of course, when I am overseas I intentionally have a greater number of fiends for selfish reasons. I am also easy to talk to and trustworthy and women feel safe around me. It was no different in Ecuador. It was odd for me, however. For the first time in my life, I can say I had zero sexual thoughts about my female friends. It didn’t come to my brain and if it did it is unlikely I could act on it. I was not thrilled with that, but it was better than the alternative I had faced.
When I first arrived I needed to locate a Doctor that would understand the type of illness (cancer) I had so I could do follow-ups. I found one. He spoke perfect English. He had spent 14 years in New York practice. he had a Brooklyn accent in fact. When I first met him I gave him medical records about 2 inches thick. He skimmed through and went right to the heart of it. it was obvious he understood what was going on. In the USA, it was only the specialist called in that actually understood so I was pleasantly surprised. On one visit I was complaining about the medication. Other side effects are that it made me really ill on some days. So tired I didn’t want to move, my body would ache as well. I felt like I was hit by a truck and needed to sleep. This was not good as it only made my need to get out and walk all the more difficult.
While there are still no alternatives, he did suggest taking a “one capsule includes all” version. In this, he said, the dosage was a bit more dialed in and I may feel better. It didn’t. In the USA my meds were free through the VA, in Ecuador, they cost me $50 a month.
There is a some good news here however. After about 2 1/2 years in Ecuador, he told me I no longer needed to take both medications. I could now take a single drug. After about a week of that new med, I could feel myself changing. I began to think of all things sexual again. I felt some energy. I stopped feeling sick from the meds. that was the biggest blessing. it was so difficult to be as active as I was and always pretending I didnt feel like walking death.
This was also around the time I was getting all the Pneumonia problems due to altitude, so it was just one thing replacing another. It was also when I began to think about moving to Colombia, and I had already visited a number of times.
By the time I actually made the move, my libido was in full swing. After the move, I have remained healthy and no more pneumonia issues as well. The Doctor was 100% correct about that and the move made a huge impact on my health in the best of ways. He also suggested I begin a 3-month course of a testosterone gel to replace what the meds had drained from me. I did that, but never really noticed anything different that I hadn’t already noticed from the meds change.
So I find myself in Manizales, feeling pretty good. To my joy, my meds in Colombia were only $12 versus the $50 in Ecuador. I also began wanting to have someone in my life, for the first time in six years. I decided to start actively looking.
While in Manizales, I really only dabbled, as I knew I would not be there long. But when I got to Armenia, I went all in. I didn’t let my financial situation get in the way, and if I found the right person it wouldn’t matter anyway. So I began meeting people. I used a few internet apps. I would meet people and flirt (girls love a gringo that sucks at Spanish apparently). As my circle of people grew, I would also be introduced to others. I can safely say I have met with, dated, etc over 30 in the past 5 months, and have chatted with twice that. I think I may be at the end of this process, and I sure hope so.
While I have met some very nice people, I cannot say I liked this process overall. It isn’t what I want to spend my time doing. But it sure educated me. What to look for, how to find someone, what to watch out for… Some things are obvious but many things were really eye openers. It truly is a minefield.
So this brings me to a dilemma. I get many many requests from other guys on this topic. My most hated and misunderstood video of all time is the “For Men Only” from a few years ago. that video was in the heart of the time I had no interest in anything sexual. Yet I would get nasty comments about what a dirty guy I was. In fact, I still get them, as my most hated video is also my most watched video. I made that video because of the endless requests by predators that wanted to go to Ecuador, flash some money and basically buy a live-in sex partner. Now I really don’t want to be judgemental about these things because I am one to not really care what others do. But I was sick of the emails, and Ecuador isn’t the place to do that anyway (for the most part). I can safely say that nearly all the hate mail I would get was from people that clearly didn’t actually watch that video. They assumed I was talking about myself looking for young girls I could buy. They even thought the cover photo was of myself. Crazy, right? That’s life on youtube.
So what is my dilemma? Glad you ask me. I get sincere questions from guys about how they should go about finding a girlfriend in Colombia. It is something I feel should be confidential. It is also something that is not comfortable for me, yet I understand because of what I have gone through. Many guys have a sincere wish to simply find love again, and not spend their life alone. I get it. And I have the knowledge now and want to help. But I have no idea in what way. I could never make a video about this, at least for general viewing. I certainly don’t care to write anything more detailed than I write this blog today. So how do I do it? I would love some advice on this.
I mentioned it may be coming to an end. I think I may have found someone. I will announce it to the world if it ends up that way, but it will likely be weeks away as I really am being cautious.
Thank you for following, and I hope being this open can help others in similar situations.